Thursday, February 4, 2010

On to Oncology

At least I understand this part to some degree-between my time with Victoria years ago in L.A. taking her through it at Cedar Sinai as well as the remarkable run my Mom had with her bout a few years back. The fact the "Team" referral coincidentally happens to be Mom's Oncologist also gives me some comfort about this meeting even though I'm still hoping I don't even really need the treatment. Again, the paperwork for first time registration and this time, the in house vampires grab some blood and the Doctor introduction. We go through some pleasantries, a quick discussion on Mom and then right to the point-"You have a problem here..... and it's not good."

We'll there's an intro to make your heat skip a beat. Um, I'm aware of that but why so grim, are there more surprises I'm unaware of? We discuss and review and then get to the "shadow' on the lung where he states-this could change everything and make a bad situation worse. Again-no subtleties here and for the first time I find the courage to ask the question Ive avoided-are talking life threatening or terminal? Talk about the longest quietest seconds awaiting a reply to a question like that.

Thank God the answer is "Oh no no-we can beat this but it certainly changes length of life as well as how we go about the treatment. " I actually take that with a sigh of relief.

Now we just need the results of the biopsy did they tell you when that would be? Did who-here we go on the communication and I can see it in his eye. You have not had a biopsy on this yet have you? "Nope!" and again, a Doc up's and leaves me to make a call. I'm really getting frustrated as this alleged "Team" is nothing of the sort.

He comes back and tells me we'll take care of it from here but it is imperative that even though it is assumed by all to not be an issue, he needs the facts and in that I completely agree. He then goes on to tell me that he will base his regiment off that outcome and will then also determine if radiation will be used at all. Really? I find this quite interesting and ask if his colleague I met with yesterday is aware of this opinion as upon leaving that meeting, he gave a similar impression however the outcome would determine the amount of Chemo administered, not amount radiation. He tells me he'll have talk with him. but again I find myself not comfortable and have the feeling of being in a used car lot with a Chevy expert and a Ford expert both pushing their product on me as the best.

We wrap the meeting with him taking me to his nurse so she can make the biopsy appointment. a follow up with his clinical nurse for a consultation of what to expect and how they do things as well my mediport installation......... STOP!!

Here we go again just like yesterday-my what?

All these guys who want to install items in my body yet we don't know what the treatment plan will be-I just don't get it. He agrees and says he'll work with me and first things first is the biopsy although now its after 5 and that department closed so the nurse will follow up and confirm tomorrow.

I leave with the feeling that this is a complete clusterfuck!

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